One of The Hardest Pills To Swallow

The other night, I found myself wide awake in deep thoughts. I kept pondering on different things because I didn’t know what to do. It’s like, how do I always end up in a situation in which I feel like I received the shorter end of a stick?

I had so many opportunities to walk away from you when my feelings weren’t as strong but I let those opportunities pass me by. Now I feel as if I can’t live life without you. There is no other human being at this moment that can make me feel so alive. There is no other human being that I can do anything with and have fun. There is no other human being that I’ve ran across that makes me feel comfortable in being my full self. 

I truly don’t know what to do. I honestly don’t want to let go of our friendship but how can I grow within it? Especially since I’m in too deep…

I can’t let another human being have that effect on me. I have to take control of my feelings and my life. But, it’s hard when I have such a strong friendship with you. We recently went nearly two weeks without speaking and my days were so dull. You really are a breath of fresh air.

When I tell you I love you, I truly mean it. I just don’t know how to keep you in my life as just a friend without having these deep feelings. At the same time, I don’t want to lose the closest person to me. 

One of the hardest pills to swallow…….

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