A Page From My Notepad


This is how I felt nearly two months ago. I was apprehensive to share this since I was battling between following my mind and my soul. I was afraid that after I posted it, I’d later regret it and end up retracting everything that I wrote just to protect others feelings. In hindsight, I’m glad I was able to follow what I felt at the time that I wrote this, because once I did that EVERYTHING started to make more sense to me.

August 31, 2020 at 10:32 PM

I’m finding myself trying to feel how I felt a few years ago with some of the same people and the feeling is just not there. It’s like my soul has grown, but my mind doesn’t want to truly accept it. My mind tells me that things could be how they once were years ago, but my soul doesn’t feel it. 

In a dilemma like this, which one do I trust? Do I follow my mind? The mind which overthinks and have me weighing all the possible options? The mind that can easily be changed and influenced by the voices around me? The mind that can possibly have me second guess myself and lead me down a path that I know I shouldn’t go down? The mind that is sometimes controlled by fear? 

Do I trust my soul? The soul that knows what’s best for me? The soul that is in tune with my true deep feelings that I may not even recognize? The soul that would give me all the answers that I need in life? The soul that is connected to my higher self?

It’s time for me to take back control of my life by trusting my soul. It’s my inner gps. It knows exactly what I want at the end of the day. Even when it doesn’t seem logical, my soul will never lead me down the wrong path. I may still experience hurt, pain, and disappointment. But, in the end I will continue to grow and learn from those experiences. That is what living soulfully is all about, having faith in knowing that what’s meant to be will always be, as long as I follow what I truly feel. 

I won’t let anyone tell me anything different. I won’t feel guilty for using my soul to make all of my decisions. This is the gift that I was given from the universe, so I will use it wisely and to the best of my ability. I will continue to believe in myself. I will believe in my soul. I will believe that I will achieve everything that’s meant for me. And most importantly, I will live soulfully. 

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