A Desire For More

Am I being selfish or greedy when it comes to me wanting more out of life? Is it wrong for me to say that I’m yearning for so much more than I am currently experiencing? 

A part of me feels that I’ve been settling for medicority (to a certain extent) over the past years. I feel like I’ve lived up to some of my potential, but definitely not the fullness of it. There’s so much more in life that I could be going after and feeding my soul with. I literally feel my soul longing for a life of true fulfillment, but yet I haven’t been giving it. I guess stagnation has gotten in the way time and time again, and I somehow allowed it to. 

Where does one start? How does one find the “more” that they’re searching for in life?

Looking back, I’ve made some of the biggest sacrifices. I was courageous enough to cut many ties that I felt were holding me back. I freed myself of people, situations, and habits in hopes of getting to that next level, but I still feel as if there’s so much more to life that I’m craving. 

Maybe I’m being impatient. Maybe I’m expecting things to just happen overnight. They say Rome wasn’t built in a day, and maybe I’m trying to construct my own version of Rome so soon. Maybe I just need to slow down and go with the flow of life. Maybe the “more” that I want out of life will come whenever the time is right and not in this very moment. I can’t deny the huge progresses that I’ve made within this year alone. I have to remain humble and grateful for all of the accomplishments that 2020 has shown. 

Truth be told, what if I really am being greedy for saying I want more out of life? What if I’m robbing myself of appreciating the present moment and all that life is giving me at this current stage?

One thing I know for sure is that whether I want more out of life or not, I will always be exactly where I am meant to be. And while I’m on this spiritual journey, I have to trust that the more that I’m longing for will come when the time is right.

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